1988th One to Post Wins: The Killing Joke! (998th person to post in second thread)

Meatlocker wrote:

The point is lost!

That's just cause yer not very sharp... lol I crack myself up.

<3

Meatlocker wrote:

The point is lost!

Uuugh... When was the last time a L12PW thread had any particular point?

Branch wrote:

MrEvilDude wrote:

Branch wrote:

That is JvS. ^^^^

W U Gotta Lie?

https://swtorot.forumotion.com/t1827-happy-bday

Holy mother of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, why did I ever disappear? I BEGETH YOUR FORGIVENESS!

Looks like two different shades of blonde to me... I don't see the problem...

And I'm not doing "no masturbation march"!! Why you people ask me that! Ask Bobabounty, he made it up!

Bobabounty wrote:

Ulyaoth wrote:

Why do lady parts have to be all "it varies from person to person, different women experience different feelings yada yada yada" and for guys it's all like "if you touch it enough, blammo! Results"

I laughed so hard I need to clean my drawers.

And also it's almost No Masturbation March.

I laughed so hard my face hurt and my lungs (punished from almost 15yrs of smoking) almost collapsed!

Dude we have all been there. The best you can do is try to find out what she likes by exploring things with fingers (and tongue!) GENTLY don't go beat the living cack out that thing! If you want that there are special clubs where you can meet that sort of woman.....










..... Apparently

Barbelith wrote:

Bobabounty wrote:

Ulyaoth wrote:

Why do lady parts have to be all "it varies from person to person, different women experience different feelings yada yada yada" and for guys it's all like "if you touch it enough, blammo! Results"

I laughed so hard I need to clean my drawers.

And also it's almost No Masturbation March.

I laughed so hard my face hurt and my lungs (punished from almost 15yrs of smoking) almost collapsed!

Dude we have all been there. The best you can do is try to find out what she likes by exploring things with fingers (and tongue!) GENTLY don't go beat the living cack out that thing! If you want that there are special clubs where you can meet that sort of woman.....


..... Apparently

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Barbelith wrote:

Bobabounty wrote:

Ulyaoth wrote:

Why do lady parts have to be all "it varies from person to person, different women experience different feelings yada yada yada" and for guys it's all like "if you touch it enough, blammo! Results"

I laughed so hard I need to clean my drawers.

And also it's almost No Masturbation March.

I laughed so hard my face hurt and my lungs (punished from almost 15yrs of smoking) almost collapsed!

Dude we have all been there. The best you can do is try to find out what she likes by exploring things with fingers (and tongue!) GENTLY don't go beat the living cack out that thing! If you want that there are special clubs where you can meet that sort of woman.....


..... Apparently

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

That reminds me of the eastcoast... I've never seen so many DDs in one square mile before... let alone one block.

Grandma....

WHY U NO UNDERSTAND TABS?!

Scott wrote:

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Barbelith wrote:

I laughed so hard my face hurt and my lungs (punished from almost 15yrs of smoking) almost collapsed!

Dude we have all been there. The best you can do is try to find out what she likes by exploring things with fingers (and tongue!) GENTLY don't go beat the living cack out that thing! If you want that there are special clubs where you can meet that sort of woman.....


..... Apparently

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

That reminds me of the eastcoast... I've never seen so many DDs in one square mile before... let alone one block.

So true, we are on the eastcoast. And within a three mile radius of us there are like five DD's. True Story.

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

*taking notes*

Ulyaoth wrote:

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

*taking notes*

HEY we gave you that advice AGES AGO. You should have used it by now. I was on line getting coffee... Spanky chatted me up, we went to a bar, got a drink or so, then went to the boardwalk. And yes made out. It was awesome. And we have been together ever since, and are now engaged, and pregnant, and have really really awesome illegal in some states romantic activities *ahem* (Frankly you should have asked your HOW to question to him, he's totally the master.)

The moral of the story is 1. You should totally go get some coffee and 2. You need to somehow make a woman feel it is ok to get into a car with a complete and total stranger.

Ulyaoth wrote:

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

*taking notes*

start by learning the difference between a spank and a slap!

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Ulyaoth wrote:

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

*taking notes*

HEY we gave you that advice AGES AGO. You should have used it by now. I was on line getting coffee... Spanky chatted me up, we went to a bar, got a drink or so, then went to the boardwalk. And yes made out. It was awesome. And we have been together ever since, and are now engaged, and pregnant, and have really really awesome illegal in some states romantic activities *ahem* (Frankly you should have asked your HOW to question to him, he's totally the master.)

The moral of the story is 1. You should totally go get some coffee and 2. You need to somehow make a woman feel it is ok to get into a car with a complete and total stranger.

I noes how!

[quote="Barbelith"]

Ulyaoth wrote:

I noes how!

Huh. That is not quite what I meant. But it made me laugh *really* loud at work, and nearly get busted browsing the ota...

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

The moral of the story is 1. You should totally go get some coffee and 2. You need to somehow make a woman feel it is ok to get into a car with a complete and total stranger.

Yeah, I think number 2 is the hurdle I'm not going to be able to leap here...

Ulyaoth wrote:

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

*taking notes*

Ok, lesson One on foreplay:
In your case, find a girl. Might wanna go over Morrigan's bit on that. Might sound like something out of a movie and with a 1000000-to-1 chance to actually work, but it's actually quite a good strategy (/hi5 at the old Spankster)... But knowing you, you'll probably end up creeping the poor girl (at the Dunkin Donuts or whatever) out with some awkward catch line... Just a heads up, stuff like 'You must be from Ireland, cause my dick is Dublin' doesn't really work... Not to any positive end in any case... Try something cute... Nice girls (by nice girls understand women who don't dress in a mini-skirt that would pass for a belt in some cultures and wear makeup like it's fucking Halloween) like the 'puppy dog' approach... Ordering the same thing as her (and standing in line right after her) makes a good excuse to go for the old 'we reach for the same cup' thing, a good ice-breaker... Another heads up, don't try the same place more than once/twice cause the staff may get the weird idea that you're some sort of sexual predator...

Lesson Two: Considering you actually manage to convince a girl that your intentions are beyond slipping her a roofie or giving her a chloroform-soaked napkin to blow her nose in and leaving her in a dumpster once you're done with her, and that it's OK to enter your car without calling her next of kin with precise details on where you're supposedly going and when she's coming back... Try to find out what she likes before you actually start being more... creative. Otherwise you risk doing something she's not particularly OK with and shutting the foreplay door barred and bolted... Though don't be all walking on crushed glass... Try exploring by yourself, there might be some things she would like but doesn't know about... But don't be too rash... Be progressive and not too much on the offensive, try to be gentle (unless you did meet in one of those places, in which case I can give you a pretty good site where you can buy some pretty neat kinky stuff)...

Imma end it at 102 cause anything after that and I might bring Bats and his wroth on me (again)...

The Joker wrote:

Ulyaoth wrote:

Mistress Morrigan wrote:

Or in Spanky's case @ Dunkin Donuts.

*taking notes*

Ok, lesson One on foreplay:
In your case, find a girl. Might wanna go over Morrigan's bit on that. Might sound like something out of a movie and with a 1000000-to-1 chance to actually work, but it's actually quite a good strategy (/hi5 at the old Spankster)... But knowing you, you'll probably end up creeping the poor girl (at the Dunkin Donuts or whatever) out with some awkward catch line... Just a heads up, stuff like 'You must be from Ireland, cause my dick is Dublin' doesn't really work... Not to any positive end in any case... Try something cute... Nice girls (by nice girls understand women who don't dress in a mini-skirt that would pass for a belt in some cultures and wear makeup like it's fucking Halloween) like the 'puppy dog' approach... Ordering the same thing as her (and standing in line right after her) makes a good excuse to go for the old 'we reach for the same cup' thing, a good ice-breaker... Another heads up, don't try the same place more than once/twice cause the staff may get the weird idea that you're some sort of sexual predator...

Lesson Two: Considering you actually manage to convince a girl that your intentions are beyond slipping her a roofie or giving her a chloroform-soaked napkin to blow her nose in and leaving her in a dumpster once you're done with her, and that it's OK to enter your car without calling her next of kin with precise details on where you're supposedly going and when she's coming back... Try to find out what she likes before you actually start being more... creative. Otherwise you risk doing something she's not particularly OK with and shutting the foreplay door barred and bolted... Though don't be all walking on crushed glass... Try exploring by yourself, there might be some things she would like but doesn't know about... But don't be too rash... Be progressive and not too much on the offensive, try to be gentle (unless you did meet in one of those places, in which case I can give you a pretty good site where you can buy some pretty neat kinky stuff)...

Imma end it at 102 cause anything after that and I might bring Bats and his wroth on me (again)...

I gave him advice on the what happens after that last night in PM, and that's why he was whineing about how all women are different. Meanwhile had he truly listened, it was fantastic advice.

ey...ey.... I was listening. I was just trying to be funny afterwards.

Meatlocker wrote:

So my school went into lockdown today.

You're lucky.... unless your school has a lot of fast food restruants.... then you're screwed