The Never-Ending Thread

Scott wrote:

Comes home... gets everything ready to go for camping trip... wife calls me Jedediah because of the beard.

Jedediah Scott. I can dig that...
  

BULKPROTEINCARBSWEIGHTSPROTEINPROTEINBULKCARBSBROSHAKESBROTEINPROTEINBULKBULKCARBS

Ban-Anad wrote:

Scott wrote:

Comes home... gets everything ready to go for camping trip... wife calls me Jedediah because of the beard.

Jedediah Scott. I can dig that...
  

Then I abruptly lost all those manpoints when I teared up at the comment...

WILBAMA wrote:

BULKPROTEINCARBSWEIGHTSPROTEINPROTEINBULKCARBSBROSHAKESBROTEINPROTEINBULKBULKCARBS

TOR?!?!?!?!

Uly needs to be a beefcake pretty soon here...

Also, dark souls II 3-part DLC. Final part comes out on september 24th... I leave september 23rd... god is cruel...

Scott wrote:

Jetbounty wrote:

Scott wrote:

I'm implying, and I'm pretty sure this is obvious, that you are not educated on the subject of critiquing, nor have a professional arts degree. You also aren't an internet celeb. So I guess the point to take away from this is: Why would anyone want to read your reviews, short of your friends/family? Why waste your time?

The average person who reads a video game review doesn't care if someone has a  professional arts degree.  What matters is if they're able to put together well thought out analyses of the product in question.

Besides, every reviewer and review site has to start somewhere.  I doubt every person who visits IGN's website is a relative or friend to the writers there.

Reviewer? Jet... I've fixed up two or three sites for you before (lord knows how many you've actually made)... you are always starting unfinished things. I've yet to see you stick with anything... so from my point of view you'll be bored with this idea within 2 weeks.  

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS 

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS

Now officially a writer for High Score Reviews c:

http://www.highscorereviews.com/

Scott wrote:

Jetbounty wrote:

Scott wrote:

I'm implying, and I'm pretty sure this is obvious, that you are not educated on the subject of critiquing, nor have a professional arts degree. You also aren't an internet celeb. So I guess the point to take away from this is: Why would anyone want to read your reviews, short of your friends/family? Why waste your time?

The average person who reads a video game review doesn't care if someone has a  professional arts degree.  What matters is if they're able to put together well thought out analyses of the product in question.

Besides, every reviewer and review site has to start somewhere.  I doubt every person who visits IGN's website is a relative or friend to the writers there.

Reviewer? Jet... I've fixed up two or three sites for you before (lord knows how many you've actually made)... you are always starting unfinished things. I've yet to see you stick with anything... so from my point of view you'll be bored with this idea within 2 weeks.  

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS 

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS

I agree with this...

Ban-Anad wrote:

Scott wrote:

Jetbounty wrote:

The average person who reads a video game review doesn't care if someone has a  professional arts degree.  What matters is if they're able to put together well thought out analyses of the product in question.

Besides, every reviewer and review site has to start somewhere.  I doubt every person who visits IGN's website is a relative or friend to the writers there.

Reviewer? Jet... I've fixed up two or three sites for you before (lord knows how many you've actually made)... you are always starting unfinished things. I've yet to see you stick with anything... so from my point of view you'll be bored with this idea within 2 weeks.  

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS 

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS

I agree with this...

You really just can't win with most people

Jetbounty wrote:

Ban-Anad wrote:

Scott wrote:

Reviewer? Jet... I've fixed up two or three sites for you before (lord knows how many you've actually made)... you are always starting unfinished things. I've yet to see you stick with anything... so from my point of view you'll be bored with this idea within 2 weeks.  

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS 

BORED WITH THIS IDEA WITHIN 2 WEEKS

I agree with this...

You really just can't win with most people

I'm sorry Jet. As much as I would like to see you pursuing your aspirations, in this particular instance it's not a very good idea.
Most, if not all, reviewers of any kind (movie, book, game, w/e) have a significant background and years of experience in their fields. They don't just go "I'm gonna make video game reviews" one day and BAM! Somehow they got a 200000 sub channel on Youtube (or their own column on say the Escapist).
It takes work and persistence. And, to a certain extent, more importantly- stature. I really don't want this to come across as me shooting you down, but nobody is gonna take a 16-year-olds' opinion on a game (or anything for that matter) seriously. Being able to rant about something (and lets face it- that's just what you'll end up doing) doesn't make you a "reviewer".

I'm not saying "don't do this", just "not now". Yes, "every reviewer has to start from somewhere" but not when you're 16 and can't legally own most of the games that come out.
And no reviewer that I know of started bang-on with doing critique. No, most often than not they just fell into the job.
Take John Bain (Total Biscuit) for instance. Before his current career as a Youtube game critic, he did WoW videos (mostly) along with other game-related informational stuff. And even before then he worked in WoW Radio. And in between all that he got involved in Starcraft Esports as a caster.

Speaking of review.... why does every companion from ME2 wear THE SAME SHIT in ME3??


Grunt and Mordin wear the same stuff. Its a little understandable. And Samara is a Justicar so maybe its part of her code? But Thane is a patient in a hospital. No change?

The worst part is Miranda and Jacob. The fuckers are on the run from Cerberus AND THEY WEAR THE SAME CLOTHES!??!?!?! I mean, all the scientist with Jacob are wearing Cerberus stuff. WEAR SOME CIVILIAN SHIT.


"Captain! Are those the Cerberus traitors?"

"Of course not! Why would traitors be wearing their old uniforms! Ignore them!"


RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!

Mr. Branch wrote:

Speaking of review.... why does every companion from ME2 wear THE SAME SHIT in ME3??


Grunt and Mordin wear the same stuff. Its a little understandable. And Samara is a Justicar so maybe its part of her code? But Thane is a patient in a hospital. No change?

The worst part is Miranda and Jacob. The fuckers are on the run from Cerberus AND THEY WEAR THE SAME CLOTHES!??!?!?! I mean, all the scientist with Jacob are wearing Cerberus stuff. WEAR SOME CIVILIAN SHIT.


"Captain! Are those the Cerberus traitors?"

"Of course not! Why would traitors be wearing their old uniforms! Ignore them!"


RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!

I think you kinda answered your question...

I agree with branch... -sincerely from the middle of nowhere

Does anyone know if that Halo master collection thing will be on 360 and if its $60?

Does the youtube player on youtube seem bigger all of a sudden to anyone else? I could've sworn it was smaller...

Ulyaoth wrote:

Does the youtube player on youtube seem bigger all of a sudden to anyone else? I could've sworn it was smaller...

Yeah. They increased the font size...

Ulyaoth wrote:

Does the youtube player on youtube seem bigger all of a sudden to anyone else? I could've sworn it was smaller...

This happened to me at like the start of the year... And nobody else seemed to have the same thing happen. Now it does it off and on

Ban-Anad wrote:

Jetbounty wrote:

Ban-Anad wrote:

I agree with this...

You really just can't win with most people

I'm sorry Jet. As much as I would like to see you pursuing your aspirations, in this particular instance it's not a very good idea.
Most, if not all, reviewers of any kind (movie, book, game, w/e) have a significant background and years of experience in their fields. They don't just go "I'm gonna make video game reviews" one day and BAM! Somehow they got a 200000 sub channel on Youtube (or their own column on say the Escapist).
It takes work and persistence. And, to a certain extent, more importantly- stature. I really don't want this to come across as me shooting you down, but nobody is gonna take a 16-year-olds' opinion on a game (or anything for that matter) seriously. Being able to rant about something (and lets face it- that's just what you'll end up doing) doesn't make you a "reviewer".

I'm not saying "don't do this", just "not now". Yes, "every reviewer has to start from somewhere" but not when you're 16 and can't legally own most of the games that come out.
And no reviewer that I know of started bang-on with doing critique. No, most often than not they just fell into the job.
Take John Bain (Total Biscuit) for instance. Before his current career as a Youtube game critic, he did WoW videos (mostly) along with other game-related informational stuff. And even before then he worked in WoW Radio. And in between all that he got involved in Starcraft Esports as a caster.

http://www.highscorereviews.com/2014/06/13/feature-san-andreas-vs-gta-v/

Yep, clearly I'm an unreasonable individual who simply rants and never evaluates a situation

  

You need to indent.

Mr. Branch wrote:

You need to indent.

This isn't an MLA format research paper, it's a review, therefore it isn't necessary to indent.  Sometimes in newspapers, magazines or books it might be, but not necessarily for an online review.  For example:



http://www.ign.com/articles/2014/03/11/dark-souls-2-review

http://www.pcgamer.com/review/assassins-creed-4-black-flag-review/

Although it certainly doesn't hurt to indent, in this case you don't have to and block paragraph style is accepted.

You ever be at work and see a girl who's clearly underage but not by a lot wearing short shorts and you can't help but steal several glances?

Me either. >_>

Jetbounty wrote:

Mr. Branch wrote:

You need to indent.

This isn't an MLA format research paper, it's a review, therefore it isn't necessary to indent.  Sometimes in newspapers, magazines or books it might be, but not necessarily for an online review.  For example:



http://www.ign.com/articles/2014/03/11/dark-souls-2-review

http://www.pcgamer.com/review/assassins-creed-4-black-flag-review/

Although it certainly doesn't hurt to indent, in this case you don't have to and block paragraph style is accepted.

Oh god, the paragraphs... Yeah, no... You need to indent. It may not be a "research paper" but it's still a professional writing, in a sense. Touching-up your pieces can really set you apart from other reviewers. An attention to how you format your text relates to how its' content's received.
With that in mind, make shorter paragraphs. Although you've made a pretty good effort to go down the list and follow through with your points. One thing manages to lead to the next relatively well.

Also, nobody wants to hear shit like this: "One time me and a friend played San Andreass and for about an hour we hid in a little corner of the LSPD’s bathroom and used a flamethrower to torch guards whenever they ran after us. We survived for an entire 20 minutes but once we ran out of stuff to start a fire we were out of luck and it was back to the drawing board." Fun story and all, but you're not telling a story. You're making an objective review. Subjective matter doesn't matter.

Another point for that: "Both games have some memorable characters and even if San Andreas had the better villain, GTA V didn’t stand much of a fighting chance, because he’s one of the best in any videogame. Ever." Again- subjective opinion on the villain. This one's OK cause it's a point of debate and a review is a good place to for those. The problem is that the whole thing is confusing. Even if San Andreas had a better villain, you say, GTA V doesn't stand a fighting chance? I get what you're trying to say. Here's how you should have said it:
"Both games have some memorable characters, though GTA V doesn't stand much of a fighting chance as San Andreas has the better villain- one of the best in any videogame."

You're also iterative at points, using the same words and phrases one after the other. Get a thesaurus. It helps. A varied vocabulary adds depth and flare to a text. It also shows that whoever wrote it did at least some preparation.

And with preparation in mind- Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance. The Seven Ps of the British Army. Proof-read. Multiple times. Also, aren't sites like that supposed to have editors? If so, how'd you get it on there with so many misspellings and grammatical errors (missing commas, mostly).

I'm just gonna assume you just wrote this in one piece on some form of text editor the site provides that has no automated spelling checker... Don't... Don't do that...

In any case. It's not a rant, you're right (though it kinda is, just a well-put one). It's actually pretty decent for a first try. And I didn't really say you were unreasonable. You don't need to be unreasonable to rant...

I do not read individual reviews... Or the reviews of smalltime wannabe reviewers (the millions on YouTube or online in general). Giving the attention to a single reviewer for their individual dissection of a topic is like me begging Disney and George Lucas to accept my character into canon... I would love for them to do it and for people to care about my character... But the simple matter of the fact is that nobody gives two shits. Much like reviews... That's the harsh reality.

Scott wrote:

I do not read individual reviews... Or the reviews of smalltime wannabe reviewers (the millions on YouTube or online in general). Giving the attention to a single reviewer for their individual dissection of a topic is like me begging Disney and George Lucas to accept my character into canon... I would love for them to do it and for people to care about my character... But the simple matter of the fact is that nobody gives two shits. Much like reviews... That's the harsh reality.

And yet game devs take Metacritic scores way too seriously...

@Ban:

Ok fair points, I'll start indenting and use a thesaurus more often. I did use one throughout most of the review but I'll be more thorough about it.

But I just have to say I disagree about the whole "don't be subjective" thing. The entire point of a review is to find out the writers opinion on something. It should have some objective info but to only list facts in a review would be boring and not achieve much. Especially when it's a comparison of two games.

As for the grammar, I wrote it on wordpress. If there are grammatical errors then I missed them when I read through it (3 times).

@Scott, ok I get it. I'm genuinely enjoying doing this, so I wouldn't care if only one person was reading my reviews. I'm just trying to get better at it right now, so I don't care if nobody reads my stuff.

Also I'm not going to start spamming the OT with my writings if you're worried about that.